“Orange” you glad I didn’t start with depressing statistics about Violence against Woman?

December 7, 2016

 

Ribbons, safety pins, pink shirt day; for a nation that attempts to be color blind when it comes to people, we are color-obsessed when it comes to the causes we claim to support.

Bringing “awareness” to a situation by using color has become so prevalent that in order for me to express how I feel about pipelines (black), breast cancer (pink), heart disease (red), the military (yellow), Epilepsy (lavender), child abuse, (light blue) I would have to look like a rainbow. But then, I support LBGTQ rights too so…

And now orange.

The United Nations called for an “Orange your Neighbourhood” from November 25th to December 10th.

As a world movement this has become the beacon color of hope and rallying cry for women around the world. The Empire State Building is bathed in orange as is the UN Tower in New York. The idea is for everyone to decorate with or wear the color orange to symbolize hope for a future free from violence against woman and girls.

“We need this eye-catching colour everywhere, so that the message is loud and clear: we all need to work together to stop violence against women and girls right now.” Says UN Women Executive Director Phumzile Miambo-Ngcuka. “That includes men and boys standing up for what’s right and working with us and the women’s movement to tackle gender inequality. We have to end this universal violation of human rights.”

Does wearing a pin or a color really help a cause?

The blogger, Angry Hijabi, doesn’t think so. She expressed that wearing a safety pins is meaningless and another symbol of white privilege.

She has a point, in that we are lulled into the idea that if we wear a pin or “like” something on Facebook that somehow we are supporting and contributing to a cause. We forget that simply wearing a color isn’t enough. Liking something on Facebook doesn’t actually feed a hungry child or protect a woman from being abused.

So why do we bother wearing a colored pin?

One of the things about wearing a color like orange or decorating with orange is that people will notice and ask. It opens up the conversation about something that is normally never spoken about, especially in some cultures.

If 1-4 women is experiencing or has experienced violence, then that means that someone you work with, someone at the gym, someone at your church or temple or mosque is a victim and is listening to this conversation. She now knows she has an ally in you.

Relational violence crosses all economic and social barriers. Some of the strongest, more powerful women you know are being beaten behind closed doors.

The Abuser will convince her that her situation is normal. That she deserved it. That she is his property and that society understands that he can do whatever he wants with his own property. That no one will believe her or help her.

When she sees everyone wearing orange, she then knows that her experience is not normal or socially acceptable. Wearing orange tells her who her allies are and who might be a safe person to talk to.

She is also dealing with the shame of the situation and often will not talk to anyone about it, but someone close to her knows or suspects.

So many times, after a tragedy strikes, someone will say that they noticed something was not right, but they didn’t know what to do about it.

Someone, maybe you, sees the abuse or suspects there is abuse, but what do you do. If you see something that doesn’t look right, don’t be afraid to get involved. We are each other’s keepers. You may save a life.

There is a lot of help out there for anyone experiencing relationship violence or anyone witnessing or suspecting relationship abuse, but you need to know who to call for help.

If you don’t know what to do, go here

http://www.kpu.ca/sites/default/files/NEVR/Community%20Champions%20Toolkit.pdf

This toolkit will tell you who you can call and what the results of your call will be. Please share the toolkit so it can get into the hands of someone who needs it to save a life.

I believe that wearing Orange and Oranging your neighbourhood is a great idea. It opens up a conversation that needs to be had. It exposes violence both in relationships against men or women; it exposes violence against women as a weapon of war; it forces us to look in horror at the statistical numbers and become motivated to get involved.

Until the world, the entire world, stops seeing women as objects which can be owned; until the world, both men and women stop seeing themselves as deserving of less than total respect and body autonomy, these degrading, violent acts will continue.

Talking about it on every level, needs to start now.   From holding magazines, advertisers and the media accountable for their portrayal of women, to supporting organizations that empower women, to holding people accountable for their words, to teaching young girls about their rights and responsibilities with regards to their own bodies, we need to keep talking, keep listening, keep yelling, keep voting, keep reminding people that – her body, her rules – is a real thing. It is a basic human right and governments can’t legislate it away, doctors can’t decide on her behalf, husbands, brothers and fathers can’t remove her rights in the name of family honor, religious belief or cultural expectations.

Trapping women in poverty, lack of education and control over her own destiny is robbing the world of brilliant minds, music, art, opinions and ideas. When half of the population is considered less-than – it is time at a minimum – to start wearing orange.

Respect for women is where the solution starts and we are all responsible for how that respect is given, shown, demanded and enforced.

But wearing a color isn’t enough. Problems don’t go away by pinning colored ribbons, they go away when enough people get mad enough and motivated enough to donate time and money and leadership to find a solution and work towards it.

If you are really against violence in vulnerable populations, then support the local women’s shelters or food banks with time, money, bake cookies, donate toys.

Liking on Facebook is never enough. Wearing a pin or decorating with orange will never be enough. You have to actually DO something about it.

You have the power to change this. You have the responsibility for your daughter’s sake, to change this. You have the ability to open this conversation.

Call an organization that is spearheading this change and ask them what they need most. Ask guests at your Christmas party to bring items for donation to a woman’s shelter; sort through your closet and give some clothes or kids toys; buy one gift for a woman at a shelter; make cookies; write a letter of encouragement for a worker or a woman in need. Write to your government. Support women who are fighting to make their own choices regarding clothes, reproduction or education.

Everybody can do something.

You can share this post and comment below on what you did today to support women suffering from violence around the world.

Can’t think of anything, contact me, I will give a hundred ideas, some will take seconds to do, some will take hours, some will be free, some will take money. All will make a real contribution to a change in these horrific statistics.

For organizations in Surrey that you can support

click on any of these links:

United Way – Surrey – Family Support

http://www.uwlm.ca/?gclid=CIXgjt3f2NACFUWRfgodKwYKzg

DIVERSEcity – Refugees and New Canadians

http://www.dcrs.ca/get-involved/how-we-are-supporting-refugees-and-what-you-can-do-to-help/

Nevr Campaign to end Violence in Relationships

http://www.kpu.ca/nevr

Like us on Facebook at NEVR – Network to Eliminate Violence in Relationships

Crisis Centre for Women in Surrey

www.surreywomenscentre.ca

Victim Services – City of Surrey

http://www.surrey.ca/community/12411.aspx

Sources – Family Support Services

http://www.sourcesbc.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=178&Itemid=98

Woman’s support services

http://www.atira.bc.ca/volunteer-opportunities-0

Options – Housing for Vulnerable populations

http://www.options.bc.ca

Domestic Abuse Support Services

http://domesticabuseservices.ca

For international support opportunities, click on these links

UN Call for and end to Violence

http://endviolence.un.org/situation.shtml

Education

http://www.vawlearningnetwork.ca/network-areas/sexual-violence

War Violence against women

http://fileserver.wave-network.org/fempowermagazine/Fempower_Magazine_26.pdf

US based support group for women internationally

https://www.usaid.gov/sites/default/files/documents/1865/toolkit_women_and_conflict_an_introductory_guide_for_programming.pdf

Start by rocking some orange and then sharing this post so we can begin to talk about what else we can do to stop violence against our most vulnerable population.